You are what you eat. People look like their dogs. And now the color of your car says what kind of person you are. At least that's what Jill Morton says.

Morton is a color consultant based in Honolulu who agrees with British researchers who years ago figured out that the color of your car (yeah, your car) says something about your personality.

Here's some results ... er, predictions ... well, whatever ...

Silver - cool headed but slightly aloof
Black - aggressive and maybe rebellious
White - a status seeking extrovert
Cream - controlled and self-contained
Gray - calm and sober, dedicated to work
Blue - reflective and cautious, introspective
Red - energetic, a quick thinker, mover, and talker
Yellow - idealistic
Green excitable
Pink - Loving, gentle, affectionate (yeah, but doesn't it give you that Mary Kay feeling?)

And if you run the numbers on auto accidents, according to a study published in the British Medical Journal, silver cars are half as likely to get involved in an injury-causing accident than other colors. Brown, black and green are the least safe colors, in the order. Maybe that's why they are predicting silver to be the next model year's biggest color choice (really).

You know, if there were scientists behind all the numbers, you'd have to wonder. Come to think about it, do they have so little to do that analyzing colors and personalities and accidents is what scientists are being paid to do?

So what do you do if you make cars and all the other manufacturers have red? If you're GM you call it something else. How about Salsa Red? Another new color name coming from GM soon is Cappuccino Frost. Chrysler is coming out with Cool Vanilla while Honda is coming out with Root Beer. And Ford? How about Merlot, Egg Yolk and Creme Brulee.

What is this? Are we making cars or did the paint department hire the Cooking Channel's staff?

Well, a lemon is still a lemon. And if you get one, get us. Squashing lemons is what we do. Every day.